BookTrib Review: Transcending Childhood Trauma in “Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar — 4/15/21: "By chapter two, Alessa, the main character in D.D. Kaye’s Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar, has already made a cringe-worthy mistake — for all the right reasons, perhaps, but a mistake just the same — and readers will be holding a collective breath and silently screaming advice at her. However, more information is soon offered up, making our girl an unavoidably sympathetic character. In this novel, Kaye has created an unusual format for telling Alessa’s story by switching back and forth between the grown-up Alessa’s efforts to improve her life and the journal entries she’s writing in an attempt to heal some deep and difficult wounds, furiously recalling a chaotic and disastrous childhood. The back story is heartbreaking and explains a lot of Alessa’s stumbling and feelings of self-hate. That she even survives is laudable, and readers may be surprised that Alessa hasn’t completely lost her sense of humor. Maybe that’s what has saved her." Read full review on BookTrib »
Bailey Viator: A powerful sharing of experience — 6/4/21: "This book took me for a ride, and I want to personally thank D. D. Kaye for being brave and vulnerable enough to share this story. Beautifully written and raw, the way this story is conveyed through language is an honor to read and experience with the author. No one could ever question victimhood after reading this work. I would read anything written by a writer with such a way with words, charming really. :)
Julie S. Porter: Dramatic Moving Novel About Emotional Scars from Childhood — 5/6/21: "D.D. Kaye's Ugly Girl Sweet Nectar is a powerful book about child abuse and how those emotional scars resonate into adulthood, making the later years ones of hardship, fear, mental illness, and self-esteem issues. The book is about Alessa, a woman who is going through massive stress in her life. Both of her parents are going through health crises. Her father is ill and in the grips of his controlling and manipulative second wife. Her mother has dementia and is living with the aftereffects of a life of alcoholism. To cope with all of this, Alessa has decided to do what she does best: write about her problems to find out how she got to this situation and what went wrong." Read full review on Amazon »
Vibha: A great novel with a lot of life lessons. — 4/24/21: "Ugly girl Sweet nectar by D.D.Kaye speaks about the inner demons that make us what we are today. It is the story of Alessa and her insecurities that she starts to acknowledge and grow by the end of the novel. Kaye has narrated the story from two different perspectives of the same person. Young Alessa through her journal entries and the now grown-up Alessa.
The journal entries introduce us to her family, a mother who abandoned her and a father whose priorities were never his children. Kaye has done a great job in showing us how the childhood trauma affected Alessa in her relationships.
She believes that the universe is always against her. She blames her mother for her alcohol issues, Father for his meek self, and herself for loving too much that she could never find the courage to let it go. She meets new people and each one gives her a new perspective. We readers will watch Alessa as she starts to acknowledge her fears, insecurities, and most importantly her kindness and try to become a better person for the sake of her children." Read full review on Goodreads » or The Vreads Book Review »
Fiya Goddess: I would recommend this to every woman. — 4/7/21: "When I read the title of the book it caught my attention instantly. I played around in the beginning because I was scared to read it. The rawness of Alessa’s words are intriguing. It’s a fictional story I believe but it’s relatable. The trauma she faced in her life is hard to read because of how realistic it is. I love her relationship with her daughters even her teenager who’s like “whatever” about everything. Her parents are disturbing if anything I can’t believe they both played a part In so much pain in her and her sisters life but at the same time I feel like I was there with them. She has healed from the trauma and at the end this is a empowering book. "
Anne Greenawalt : An Important and Empowering Story — 4/6/21: "Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar is a brave book based on a true story that tackles childhood abuse and the resulting adult trauma like poor relationships, guilt, self-consciousness, and low self-esteem. To ease the heaviness of these topics, the author also provides many doses of light-heartedness and hope, mostly in scenes with the protagonist's children and kind strangers.
The protagonist, Alessa, narrates her story to show her complicated adult relationships with her parents and uses journal entries to illustrate the numerous and complex instances of childhood emotional abuse and neglect she suffered because of them. Despite her parents' inability to care for Alessa, she caregives for all of them as they age and become ill. The childhood abuse scenes are uncomfortable, but I think it's her parents' actions and words in her adult life that made me angriest. Stories acknowledging trauma and its effects are not easy to tell -- or listen to. But Alessa is a sympathetic, genuine character. She doesn't sugarcoat her story: she wears her flaws on her sleeve and doesn't skimp on her life's details. But she also embodies love, hope, forgiveness, and self-healing, which make this an important and empowering story." Read full review on Amazon »
LegitReviews (Punica Bhardwaj): I could not put this book down — 2/28/21: "When I started reading this book, I was intrigued by the title and the premise. What I didn’t expect was the sheer amount of the realness of the story. Alessa and Lilla are all of us, in some part or the other. There are many times during the story that help you validate the reality you’ve lived with and to think “you’re not alone”. At some points I was annoyed by alessa for not even trying to work on herself but as you dive deep into all that she went thru, you cannot help but side with her. She did all she could and thank god for her courage at barely 12 years old to take charge and protect her little sister. All older sisters /siblings can relate to that. At the heart of this book is a story about mental illness and the stigma around it. We discover the one disease which was the root cause of all the issues everyone faced, but I can’t help but wonder if Pam had one too? The behaviour she exhibited cannot possibly be categorised as ‘normal’. My heart breaks for the father, he didn’t deserve it but I wish he’d just stood up for his girls. This book is extremely hard to read due to how much trauma is discussed, but at the same time it’s very hard to stop once you start. (It was also fascinating to read the dialogues between vinay and alessa. It sounds like a lot of my buddies from India! I do wonder if the name Prakeet was a typo. Did the author mean to name the character Prateek?) In all, 5/5."
Nicky Skene: Highly emotional read! — 2/25/21: "Written in the form of an almost memoir, based on true life but also a work of fiction. However you would describe the genre/type of book - I thought it was a highly emotional read! Our heroine Alessa journals her early lifetime experiences which gives us an insight into the hows and whys of her now introverted and almost secluded lifestyle. Alessa decides to get herself out there but finds it difficult to at first. I love the way this has been written - present time with the journal entries being written to give us a view of her past. At different times of the book I found it to be happy, sad, funny, infuriating and at other times disturbing. A first for me from D.D. Kaye, I found this to be very well written and a truly beautiful story overall. Highlighted to me the importance of love, acceptance, forgiveness and beliefs. Would highly recommend. I was gifted a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review." Note: The review is also posted on Nicky Skene's book blog: Too Many Books Never Enough Time
Emma W.: Delightful Read — 2/24/21: "My husband bought “Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar” for me. It’s what I can best describe as a life-changing read. I had experienced many of the same situations as Alessa like childhood trauma, job loss, caring for aging parents, issues with forming personal relationships, self image issues. Ugly Girl Sweet Nectar provided some new and unique insights for healing and forgiving. I strongly recommend this book to anyone who has been affected by physical and/or emotional trauma of any kind. As the book reminds us, we are products of our environment, but our environment doesn't have to define where we end up in the future. *Peace*"
Panyol (Maria Rivas McMillan) : It may be just me but... — 2/21/21: "There were elements I really enjoyed in Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar, particularly the laugh out loud bits. Then, there were moments when I skimmed to get to the next part. And, there were times when I really had no patience with the lead character who had a a childhood from hell but, then, three children later when does adulting kick in? At one point, I wondered if the experiences of different people had been coddled together. The mother, father, stepmother relationships were very weird to me and her response mechanisms even more so. A succession of bad choices combined with a focus on the frivolous when she’d been unemployed for months left me exasperated. However, it may just be me. I received a complimentary copy for a fair review. "
Ganesh V.: Inspiration, emotional memoir of a strong woman — 2/13/21: "A personal memoir with strong personal experiences, this book is difficult to sum up in one word. It has a mix of the universal philosophy, the pain of the wronged, the love of a child towards one’s parents, the care of a sister, warmth of a mother and genuine of a friend. One could easily relate to the protagonist, with their share of troubles and daily challenges, with numerous curve balls from life. Yet, universe finds a way to send a message to enable the protagonist to embrace the darker aspects of her life and ultimately get some amount of closures. While certain loose ends do get ultimately wrapped up, I personally hope that the protagonist found a better person for her own life. Written with flash-backs and interspersed with poems, this emotional roller coaster ride is definitely a must read !!!!" Note: Amazon (India) review can be seen on amazon.in
SNG: So grateful to have read this book - loved it! — 2/4/21: "I don’t recall reading a book that affected me quite like Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar. It inspired me to take a look at hurtful experiences in my own life that caused self-image issues. I commend the author for candidly sharing a difficult story".
KSL: A wonderful, thought-provoking read — 1/22/21: "I loved this book. There were plenty of "this could be me!" moments sprinkled throughout, as well as plenty of thought-provoking insights worthy of pondering. Although Alessa's life had many sad and even horrific events in it, her strength and resilience were amazing and inspiring. A wonderful read, especially for women entering the second half of their lives who are ready to let go of the "should nots' and embrace the "shoulds".
MAK: Bitter and Beautiful — 1/16/21: "The title of the book intrigued me, and the synopsis compelled me. Especially after watching the YouTube book trailer mentioned in the description. I expected the book to be an interesting read but then found it to be SO much more. It's a reminder that we are all a product of our environments and experiences. We can be programmed to believe we are ugly and bad. Horrible acts inflicted on us as children can create shame and guilt that we subconsciously carry into our adult lives and negatively affects self-image, relationships, and parenting. The descriptions of the childhood abuses described in Alessa’s memories were horrific but written in a way that didn’t make me feel too uncomfortable to read them, though I was very much affected. My heart bled for her. Her childhood memories were triggered when caring for her dying parents, the abusers. She really had to fight her inner demons in order to forgive them. Despite it all there is enough lighthearted moments and a touch of humor in the main story of Alessa’s adult life to offset the intense darkness. I found it heartwarming that something so inspiring, enthralling, and eye opening could come out of such a traumatic life. Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar is very well written and an amazing story that will stick in my mind for a long time."
Based on a true story. A thought-provoking and inspiring novel about the turbulent process of healing even the most unimaginable wounds from childhood abuse and those scars that resonate into adulthood.
"I was an ugly freak. It was no wonder why I was violated, and my parents rejected me. I felt wretched and ashamed, plagued with guilt that somehow everything was my fault. It was my fault that my parents divorced. It was my fault that I was violated, and somehow it was even my fault for being born so ugly. Sobs tried to punch through, ripping through my guts, muscles, and bones as I ran. But I held it all in, held it in tight. I kept a stiff upper lip – just as I had been taught. I wanted to vanish – to disappear."
After spending a lifetime of living a secluded life, Alessa journals her experiences as she embarks on a quest to live a more colorful life of “Shoulds” instead of “Should Nots”. She courageously emerges from her hermit cave and re-enters the dating scene when a rude awakening unexpectedly detours her journey down a path of self-reflection to examine her character flaws, self-image issues, and what caused them.
Compelled to find answers, Alessa digs deep to unearth her past, and discovers a scathing childhood of abuse and trauma. At the same time, she is faced with the seemingly impossible duty of taking care of the abusers – her parents. Both suffer from rare and merciless diseases. With the help of her best friend, and some random acquaintances, Alessa learns to heal herself, and finds the fortitude needed to forgive her parents so she can see them through their illnesses to the bitter end.
Entwining pain, strength, and humor, Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar is an inspirational and intimate story about the power of survival, forgiveness, and resilience. It candidly explores the devastating effects of childhood trauma on the human spirit; how it shapes one’s emotional life as an adult, and subconsciously affects every aspect of it – relationships, parenting, body image, and more. It speaks unflinching truth to the turbulent process of healing, and how the process can repair even the most unimaginable wounds.
DISCLAIMER: Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar is based on a true story. The form that it is written is that of a memoir, but it is not a traditional memoir in that time has been rearranged to suit the convenience of the book. To maintain anonymity, the names of individuals (living and dead) and in some instances the names of places and locations were changed, along with identifying details such as physical appearance and age. Some events have been compressed, and some dialogue has been recreated. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead is purely coincidental.
Genre. Based on a true story, Family & Relationships, Overcoming Childhood Trauma, Surviving Abuse, Body Image Issues, Self-worth, Loving Yourself, Forgiving Others.
Mature Subject Matter. Some violence, light swearing, some sexual situations.
Slightly dramatic piano music with no words begins playing. The rhythm is a medium tempo and continues to play throughout each scene until end of the video."
Scene 1: A black background with dark pink text that says, “Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar”. There is a scroll design around the letters.
Scene 2: A black background with blue text that says, “Based on a true story.” There is a scroll design around the letters.
Scene 3: There is a cosmic circular figure made of stars against a dark purple background. The caption says, “Alessa, a single woman in her 40s experienced a life-changing MOMENT OF CLARITY...”
Scene 4: A dark silhouette of a woman is running toward a sunset. The caption says, “...a calling that inspired her to courageously step out from the security of her recluse life and embark on a quest to live a more colorful life of “Shoulds” instead of “Should Nots”.
Scene 5: The silhouette of a woman is climbing a mountain at sunrise. The sky is orange and yellow and the white sun is hovering just above the horizon of the mountain peaks. The caption says, “This was HER journey and she was open to trying new things.”
Scene 6: A mound of red confetti in the shape of a heart explodes into individual pieces of confetti. The caption says, “Feeling confident and optimistic about her 'new me', Alessa stepped up her game and felt ALIVE again!"
Scene 7: A man and woman are holding wine glasses. Their faces are not shown but they are sitting on the couch in front of a fireplace and there is romantic lighting. They lift their glasses and clink them together in a toast. The caption says, “She even tried dating again... and that’s when a rude awakening unexpectedly detoured her journey.”
Scene 8: A glass red rose drops on a white surface and shatters into hundreds of pieces. The caption says, “She went down a path of self-reflection to examine her character flaws and self-image issues.”
Scene 9: A slightly overweight woman is standing in front of the mirror. She turns side-to-side studying her body. She is wearing conservative navy-blue bra and underwear. The caption says, “What caused them?” (Note: the question is referring to the previous scene regarding characters flaws and self-image issues.)
Scene 10: A sky with storm clouds moving across the sky becomes increasingly darker. The caption says, “Compelled to find answers, Alessa excavated deep to unearth her past and discovered a scathing childhood of abuse and trauma.”
Scene 11: In the dark, flashes of laser lights going in all different directions (like chaos). The caption says, “Memories were unlocked that had been buried for decades...”
Scene 12: An abstract scene of a woman screaming, covering her face, crying. Her face is splashed with all different color paint. The caption says, “unworthiness... guilt... shame. She felt like an ugly freak.
Scene 13: The background is black. A white glass rose drops on a black surface and shatters into pieces. The caption says, “It was no wonder why she was violated, mentally tortured, neglected, her VOICE SILENCED!”
Scene 14: A woman wearing a heavy coat runs through the woods. The caption says, “Sobs tried to punch through, ripping through her guts, muscles and bones as she ran. But she held it all in. Held it in tight. She kept a stiff upper lip – just as she had been taught.”
Scene 15: An old woman is sitting in a wheelchair. Someone is holding her hands and caressing them. The caption says, “While trying to face her past she was faced with the impossible duty of taking care of the abusers. HER PARENTS.
Scene 16: A beach scene. Blue sky, small waves and surf rolling out onto the sand. The caption says, “UGLY GIRL, SWEET NECTAR is an inspiring story about the power of survival, forgiveness and resilience. It explores adverse effects of childhood trauma, and how it shapes one’s emotional life as an adult."
Scene 17: A fluffy pink flower slowly opens. The caption says, “It speaks to the bitter process of healing and how the process can repair the most unimaginable wounds.”
Scene 18: Final scene. On the left side there is text that says, “Buy on Amazon, e-book and paperback. Video by sunsetfiredesigns.com." On the right side there is an image of the book cover that looks like this: There is a wide horizontal dark pink strip at the top containing white text, “Ugly Girl, Sweet Nectar”. The middle part of the book is green. There is a drawn image of the profile of a woman's face. Her eyes are closed, her lipstick is dark pink. Hovering next to her head is a blue box with white clouds and a drawn image of a little girl. She is skipping and wearing a bright pink dress. The blue box with the little girl represents the woman’s memory. The lower part of the book has a wide light pink horizontal strip wtih text that says, “D. D. Kaye”.
End of Transcript.
OTHER BOOKS BY D.D. KAYE
THE BACKSEAT SHRINK
An erupting scandal forces Dr. Lowe an acclaimed psychiatrist to live on the streets in his station wagon, where he finds himself the backseat shrink to a cast of street denizens and mobsters. Read more / BUY »
NOFNIK BATTLE OF FROYD.
A brutal despot known as Sir Froyd, in an act of revenge, overthrows a kingdom in a sneaky ploy. A non-stop adventure with soldiers, legendary Sea Sprites, Sea Dragons and other unworldly characters.